Sunday, August 9, 2009
The madness and melancholy of moving
We're leaving our mountain mansion in Lake Tahoe and moving to Las Vegas. Lots of reasons: downsize, better for the arthritis, livlier, 300 miles closer to our daughter in LA. I didn't realize how monumental the packing would be: 20 boxes of books, LP's, CD's, even 78's and that doesn't include the "high value" art and ceramics. I've lived in three countries and 14 houses but this one seems overwhelming. As my dear wife Peggy pointed out, "We have an intact marriage of over 50 years, we've lived a long time in a lot of places and we're taking our past with us." Of course, but it still isn't easy. In the new film "Julie and Julia" Julia Child says of her expatriate life abroad, "Where is home?" and her husband says, "Wherever we are is home". Johnny Mercer wrote a song, "Anywhere I hang my hat is home". It's true but as John Updike says in one of his stories that packing up and leaving the home empty with all its memories is something you'll miss. But he adds that the house won't miss you for a day.
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I remember being a student at Columbia University, sitting in the back row (naturally) of a lecture on Statistical Methods in Manufacturing by W. Edwards Deming. I had heard that Deming was an easy grader, and indeed, he had just told the entire class that everyone would receive A's. "Good, I can catch up with my New York Times." Almost in unison, half the class pulled out newspapers to read. Dr. Deming then followed with, 'After all, you paid for this class. It is not necessary for you to listen to me or to change. Your survival is not mandatory.' One by one, the papers came down.
ReplyDeleteMoving is difficult. Change is hard. Moving stinks. In these situations, like to think of what I Andy Warhol once said: "They say times changes thing, but you actually have to change them yourself."
-Thor